I am in a situation (and have been for nearly two years where it has been getting progressively worse) where I am surrounded by people who are in constant conflict with each other (and in turn, with me). My mom was/is emotionally abusive and I have had to go through a lot of therapy and learn to set boundaries to begin healing.
My fiance really hates her (and my dad for enabling) and things were really tense between them. Also, I was for awhile not addressing some of the issues my parents were causing in getting in the middle of our relationship. i have since tried to do so and my parents have gotten better (relatively speaking) but it has caused a lot of long-term problems with my fiance and I. Oftentimes we feel that we are put in the middle of issues with our parents and pitted against each other. The low-point of my life was our lease not getting renewed in our co-op because neighbors had filed complaints about our fights (not abuse, just yelling). That happened about 7 months ago. Of course we were and are mortified and feel awful.
Since then though, now my FIANCE’s parents are getting in on this and are constantly getting on my fiance’s case, saying rude stuff about me and trying to control our wedding. Mostly, my fiance has fought back but lately he has been really stressed and his reaction to stress is to yell. The latest thing is that my parents are angry at me for booking the wedding 1 hour and 45 min from them and are calling me hypocritical because I previously said I wanted the wedding to be equidistant between both families. And today, my fiance’s mom got angry at him for not calling them on their anniversary and she got angry at me for not posting about her on Mother’s Day on Facebook when I posted about my own mom. I thought my fiance would take my side but he thinks it was really rude of me and not considerate (I think he is lashing out because his mom freaked out at them for not calling and just texting on their anniversary and called him a bad son).
Anyway so every single day is another source of drama and stress and anxiety and someone is usually always mad at my fiance or me or both. Today I feel like the scapegoat. Some days it’s him. I feel really alone and miserable in a constant tornado of entitled angry people.
I know I probably sound like a dramatic, unhealthy and immature person. I am going to therapy and work on myself a LOT. I struggle with paralyzing indecision because someone will be angry at me no matter what I do.
I hate my life and am drowning.
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