Treasurer Josh Frydenberg returns household from his current vacation to Canberra. Sign up for us, as another fly on the wall, in his relatives property.
JOSH: I’m house, darling. It is so excellent to be back again.
AMIE: Honey, I see you’re donning the black jacket and slacks I bought you. Is that for the reason that you want to be in a position to say you are back again in black?
JOSH: Ha, ha. Incredibly amusing, honey.
AMIE: How was Canberra? You weren’t away prolonged.
JOSH: As a Victorian, I didn’t want to overstay my welcome further than our borders. We Melburnians, in unique, aren’t really flavour of the month at the second.
AMIE: Did you cop the cold shoulder in Canberra?
JOSH: Considerably from it. Canberra without the need of all the politicians and lobbyists is really quite enjoyable. Chilly, but pleasant.
AMIE: Which is good. I know it is been a stress filled time for you. It is stress filled for us as nicely.
JOSH: Sure, I know, pricey. I have been a bit grumpy these days and have not shown considerably desire in you this yr. I’m definitely sorry about that. In simple fact, I bought you a specific anything while I was in Canberra.
AMIE: Identical in this article. I know I’ve been a bit quick with you of late and I have acquired a minor some thing for you. It can hold out until soon after evening meal.
JOSH: That is so sweet. Where’s our daughter?
AMIE: In her place catching up with her school scientific tests. She’s been addicted to Netflix, so I have informed her she has to entire her English assignment ahead of evening meal. Really do not interrupt her.
JOSH: Ok. Where are the canine? I want to see them.
AMIE: In the backyard. Enable them in. They’ll be beside themselves to see you.
(Josh goes to the again door, opens it and in hurry their puppies who instantly start out leaping all in excess of Australia’s Treasurer.)
JOSH: Ronny. Maggie. I have missed you, also. Have you been a superior boy, Ronny? Who’s the fairly woman, Maggie?
(The dogs go ballistic and jump all in excess of the home furnishings, managing all-around the room and building havoc.)
AMIE: More than enough! Ronny! Maggie! Plenty of! Oh Josh, how quite a few moments do I have to notify you not to get them started off? You know what they are like. Take them exterior and perform with them until eventually I have our meal completely ready. Will not be extensive.
JOSH: All right. Arrive on, doggies. Ronny. Maggie.
(The a few of them go outside. Josh returns when beckoned for supper, leaving Ronny and Maggie outside the house. Josh, Aimee and their daughter nosh into their night meal.)
JOSH: I have a minor little bit of news for you, my daughter. I have faith in you will choose it properly. I have realised your allowance for the final three or four months has been a bit extremely generous. I’d factored in expenditures for you to get to and from school, lunch costs and so on. Very well, with all the distant discovering and homeschooling you’re dealing with now, really frankly, you no longer demand these types of a generous allowance. I’m frightened the honeymoon is more than you will however get an allowance, but only 80 per cent of what it has been. My conclusion is final.
(Their daughter does what any teenager would do confronted with information like that — she gets up, leaves the desk and goes to her home.)
AMIE: You didn’t cope with that extremely perfectly, Josh.
JOSH: That is well and excellent, but no baby in our extended spouse and children, at any time, has gained these a superior weekly allowance.
(Josh and Aimee entire their meal in an uneasy silence. As soon as the desk is cleared and dishes are in the dishwasher, they retire to the residing room.)
JOSH: Honey. Traveling to Canberra created me realise how substantially you mean to me and how minor fascination I have demonstrated you and what you do. I’m actually sorry. The strain of this 12 months, having to give all that dollars away, viewing the debt and deficit blowing out, no hope of having the funds back again in black, it’s gotten to me.
AMIE: I won’t lie to you. It hasn’t been simple for me. You haven’t made a go at me in months. Don’t you come across me eye-catching any longer?
JOSH: Of system I do, but my libido has taken rather a nosedive. That is exactly where my gift arrives in. I’ll go and get it.
AMIE: Oh, good. I’ll fetch my gift for you, way too.
(Josh returns holding a zipped up go well with cover. Aimee returns, clutching a ebook in her arms.)
JOSH: You go initial, honey.
AMIE: I remembered how a lot you appreciate dual Guy Booker Prize winner Hilary Mantel’s creating. I stumbled across a reserve of hers I’d under no circumstances read of, and imagined you’d adore it — ‘The Assassination Of Margaret Thatcher’.
JOSH: Genuinely? Oh, thank you, honey. Properly, err, umm, I’m not fairly sure how to say this. You know how inspirational I obtain Margaret Thatcher.
JOSH: This is for you.
(Josh palms his wife the accommodate protect.)
JOSH: Open up it.
(Aimee unzips the address and can take out a sky blue go well with for women of all ages, in just the design and style Margaret Thatcher was famed for putting on.)
JOSH: Any prospect of putting on it tonight and doing your hair in the model Thatcher wore when she was Primary Minister? I assume it could make all the change.
(Each and every few demands their privacy. It can be is no diverse for our nation’s Treasurer.)
Rocky Dabscheck is a musician/songwriter and front individual for Rocky and The Two Bob Millionaires. He is also the author of ‘42+1: The (Authentic) That means of Life‘ and ‘Stoney Broke and the Hi-Spenders‘.
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